Therapy In Neptune

“hello Mak.


it seems


you’ve finally


come to your senses.


you’ve returned.”


—


“you have


three eyes.


you’re not real.”


—


“and yet—


here you are again.


same seat.


same silence.


seeking me


once again.”


—


“so before


the snarky comments—


tell me.


what brings you back?”


—


“Neptune.


it’s june.


might be


too late soon.”


—


“too late


for what?”


—


“for people


to keep thinking


i don’t see.”


—


“interesting.”


—


“i feel emotionless.”


—


“emotionless?”


—


“no.


i feel emotion


less.


there’s a difference.”


—


“explain it.”


—


“i still feel.


i still remember.


everything.


i just don’t drown


in it anymore.”


—


“so you’re numb.”


—


“no.


i’m above it.”


—


“above it?”


—


“above the noise.


above the stories.


above the phony behavior


i must confess


i used to let


too close.”


—


“you sound certain.”


—


“i am.”


—


“then why


come here?”


—


“to see


if you still


understood me.”


—


“and?”


—


“you almost did.”


—


“almost?”


—


“you keep trying


to turn clarity


into a wound.”


—


“isn’t it?”


—


“not anymore.”


—


“Mak—”


—


“no.


listen.”


—


“…”


—


“how could they


really know me?


they don’t.


they know


old versions.


old angles.


old access.


old stories


they keep repeating


because the present


doesn’t serve them.”


—


“and that


doesn’t hurt you?”


—


“not like before.”


—


“why?”


—


“because i stopped


needing people


to understand


what they never


had the range


to carry.”


—


“range?”


—


“yes.


range.


depth.


capacity.


whatever word


helps you sit


with it better.”


—


“you’ve gotten sharp.”


—


“i’ve gotten honest.”


—


“and the character


assassination?”


—


“unacceptable.”


—


“that simple?”


—


“that simple.


any attempt


to rewrite me


so someone else


can feel innocent


is unacceptable.”


—


“and what


will you do?”


—


“nothing.”


—


“nothing?”


—


“i’ll move forward.


i’ll cut access


where access


became entitlement.


i’ll remember


what happened


without letting it


control my pulse.”


—


“that sounds cold.”


—


“that sounds clean.”


—


“you’re not here


for therapy.”


—


“no.”


—


“then what


is this?”


—


“confirmation.”


—


“of what?”


—


“that i don’t need


to explain


a decision


i already


stand on.”


— Mr. Mak


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